The Disturbing and Depressing Colouring Book

It's Fried, eh? - The Disturbing and Depressing Colouring Book

A Poetic Moment with LL Cool J

Hey yo, man
Ain't nothin like a nice bowl of
Cornflakes in the morning
to smooth you out

Milky Cereal, Baby

Mirror, mirror on the wall
Who's the baddest female of them all?
It was Frosted Flake, she loved to bowl
And although her skin was white she had a lot of soul
Rich female, very debonnaire
Drivin a Rolls with rollers in her hair
We was hangin out, pumpin the stereo
She took me to a club, I think the name was Cheerio's
She walked like she was jumpin a hurdle
I was happy as a kid that just saw Mutant Ninja Turtles
A guy walked over, said, "Your earring's cute"
I said, "I'm wearin a earring, but it ain't no Fruit Loop"
Me and Frosted went to get a drink
But she ordered somethin bugged and I ain't know what to think
She ordered potassium, calcium
Carbohydrate scotch with sodium
She took me to her crib, threw me on the couch
I woke up the next morning with a spoon in my mouth

She's Milky Cereal, Baby

The Fort Restaurant - Lebanon, NH

The Fort - 151 Heater Road, Lebanon, NH 03766-1451
(603) 448-5512
‎


Out of sheer geographic happenstance and the driving force of hunger, the GF and I stumbled upon The Fort en route to Burlington, VT. To the untrained eye, The Fort looks like any generic truck stop, but it is a hidden gem.

I had the lasagna and it was fantastic!  It reminded me of home cooking, made with fresh ingredients... oh yeah, and a lot of cheese.  The GF had the Philly Cheese Steak and it was great as well.  The portions were very generous,  both of our meals needed to be packed up and fed us again later.  By the time we left, the place was packed... always a good sign.  The Fort is definitely off the beaten path, but if you're in the neighbourhood, it's worth stopping by.

DDD - The Eveready Diner, Hyde Park NY

On a road trip to New York state, my friend Kurt and I took a detour to check out the Eveready Diner in Hyde Park, NY.  My memory of the visit was a little bit fuzzy as I was nursing what was probably the worst hangover of my life.  After getting hammered in Albany, and staying the night at a dreadful flea-bag hotel, we forged on to Hyde Park.  No amount of grease could cure what I was going through.  All I seem to remember from the experience was triple shots of top-shelf scotch, a very uncomfortable bed, a shower with a moving floor, something about goats written on a window, getting stuck in a condemned elevator... and the Eveready Diner.  I do believe I ordered the Ruben Sandwich, a bowl of French Onion Soup, a root beer and a kick-ass piece of fluffy cheesecake.  From what I remember, the soup kicked ass, the sandwich was nothing to write home about and the cheesecake was plentiful and tasty as hell.  I'd like to go back one day in a more human state to judge the site properly, but for now - this is my review of the Eveready Diner.

On a side note, the Ruben is being compared to some pretty healthy competition.  I've had Rubens at Katz's and Wolf's in New York as well as the Stage Deli in Las Vegas.

The Eveready was featured on Diner, Drive Ins and Dives - check out the clip here: 
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RVolPZ8Vxj0

Concert Review: Grinderman, Armen Ra - The Phoenix Concert Theatre - Toronto, ON - November 11, 2010

Grinderman kicked of their North American tour last night in Toronto to a packed house at The Phoenix.  The supporting act was Armen Ra, a Theremin player who looked like Pee Wee Herman and played what I can only describe as music to play while levitating.  This was, without doubt, the most out-of-place opening act I have ever seen.  It would be the equivalent of having Zamphir open for Slayer.  Ra did his thing, whatever the hell it was, and went on his merry way.  I have never seen a crowd so angry and confused at the same time... truly bizarre.  The only question I have is, why?

After a quick sound-check, Nick Cave and the rest of Grinderman took to the stage and turned it up to 11, well, more like 14 actually.  I could feel the bass in my chest as the band opened up with "Mickey Mouse and the Goodbye Man".  In true Cave fashion, it was aggressive and powerful.  Throughout the set, Grinderman delivered a healthy selection of tunes from their new album including "Kitchenette", "Heathen Child", "Worm Tamer" and "Palaces of Montezuma". 

They also played material from their debut album, including an inspired version of "No Pussy Blues", "Get It On" and "Honey Bee (Let's Fly to Mars)".  For those who are familiar with Nick Cave, you know he is a showman.  He always puts it all on the table and leaves nothing behind - and last night was no different.  Overall it was a great show. I will look forward to the next time Cave comes to town.

Setlist:

Mickey Mouse and the Goodbye Man

Worm Tamer

Get It On

Heathen Child

Evil

When My Baby Comes

What I Know

Honey Bee (Let's Fly to Mars)

Kitchenette

No Pussy Blues

Bell Ringer Blues

Encore:

Palaces Of Montezuma

When My Love Comes Down

Man in the Moon

Love Bomb

Grinderman

Concert Review: Joel Plaskett, David Myles - River Run Centre - Guelph, ON - November 5, 2010

On a brisk November night in Guelph, the vibe inside the River Run Centre was warm, lighthearted and electric, in anticipation of the 'Rock N' Roll show'.  Entering, stage right, with his gray suit, glasses and geeky, yet GQ style (he looked like a banker) - David Myles opened up the show with a short, but engaging set. This included some of his older songs, mixed in with a couple of tunes from his new album, "Turn Time Off" (produced by Joel).  His witty anecdotes fit right into the mood of the evening and the sold out crowd definitely warmed to Mr. Myles.

Joel took the stage after a brief intermission and jumped right into his set with a killer version of "Make a Little Noise".  He was in fine form, and mixing it up chronologically - playing plenty of tracks from "Three", but also a healthy balance of tunes from his entire catalogue.  After a few tunes by his lonesome, he welcomed his father, Bill Plaskett, on stage to join him.  Their harmonies were bang-on, it was certainly an enjoyable twist to the evening.

Some of the show highlights included "Down at the Khyber", "Every Time You Leave", "Heartless, Heartless, Heartless", "Nowhere With You", "Sailor's Eyes", "Deny, Deny, Deny" and a couple of brand new tunes - "Island Girls and Harbour Boys" and I think the other one was called "I'm Yours".

Other highlights included Joel rocking out to a back-track of "Fashionable People" playing on his iPod, the Casio styling of "Rewind, Rewind" Rewind", a rocking acoustic rendition of "Through & Through & Through" and a brilliant combined effort from Joel and Bill on "Rollin', Rollin' Rollin'" to cap the evening!  Thanks for a fantastic evening - Joel, Bill and David.  I should also mention that the RRC in Guelph is a great place to see a show.  The acoustics were fantastic and there was not a bad seat in the house.

Beer Review: Southern Tier Pumking Imperial Pumpkin Ale

It's almost curtains on October, so it would be only fitting to review some pumpkin beers. Up until last month I had never tried this behemoth of a beer.  Just bringing the bottle to your nose tells you this is not messing around, and probably not for everyone.  It is very smooth to drink and has a rich malty flavour followed by a pumpkin spice kick.  You do taste the alcohol as it checks in at 8.8% - but it works, it really works.  It's definitely one of my favorite pumpkin beers to date.  Rating A

407ETR - Highway Robbery

Yesterday I made the mistake of looking at my bill from the resident evil over at the offices of Highway 407ETR.  Up until that point, I was actually in a pretty decent mood.  I came to the realization that I am paying these greedy pricks almost $9.00 per day if I decide to use their precious road.  I am now thinking twice, or dare I say, thrice about using the 407.  It is true - the highway is very convenient - but... really?  They are charging me an average of $.021 a kilometer and I travel 40km per day if I take it to and from work. 

Here is a quick math breakdown of my 407 expenses:

40km X $0.21 = $8.40

Approximately 19 work days per month = $159.60

12 months per year = $1,915.20

What's that?  There should be some kind of reward for traveling the highway this frequently?  Well, here it is.  I usually qualify for Tier 3 of their rewards program, which is the equivalent of a giant middle finger gouging out one of my eyes.  I qualify for 55km of FREE highway use on Sundays as well as $0.03 per litre off on gasoline (up to 120 litres), but only if I want to use Petro Canada (which I don't).  The other problem with this is I don't work on Sundays and I rarely have the occasion to "take advantage" of my FREE kilometers.

Now that I have actually broken this down monetarily, I see a lot of back roads and side streets in my future. 

Movie review: After.Life (2009)

Without spoiling the movie, here is a brief summary.  Paul (Justin Long) and Anna (Christina Ricci) are dating; one of them dies and wakes up on a funeral home prep table.  The funeral director/mortician Eliot (Liam Neeson) proceeds to interact with the 'deceased' to help them transition into their afterlife.  Several suspense movie clichés ensue as the plot progresses. What's that?  Every suspense thriller needs a socially inept kid who seems to relate to the plot?  Don't worry, this movie has one... his name is Jack.

The carefully constructed  plot draws you in and keeps you guessing throughout the duration.  Even when the credits rolled, I am not entirely convinced of what really happened.  Was Neeson really the bad guy or was it a play on some sort of dreamscape of the afterlife?  I know what conclusions I've drawn, but I'm curious what others got from it.

The suspense generated on screen was convincing; you are always on the edge of your seat.  The acting was decent and there was plenty of gratuitous Christina Ricci nudity - not a bad thing.  Justin Long in a dramatic role?  Not sure about that one - but he was adequate enough.  If you're looking for a decent suspense thriller, check this one out.

Rating C+

It's Fried, eh? + YGTBFKM | Krispy Kreme Bacon Cheeseburgers

That's right, this image depicts a plethora of Krispy Kreme Bacon Cheeseburgers.  My arteries are congesting just looking at them! I can't help but think of the time Homer encourages Bart to "butter up that bacon" and "bacon up that sausage"... "but Dad, my heart hurts".  Have a good weekend!

Concert Review: Rootstock 2010 - Joel Plaskett, Hawksley Workman, Sarah Slean, Steven Page - Jackson Triggs Amphitheatre - Niagara-On-The-Lake, ON - August 27, 2010

On Friday morning, these plans developed rather quickly with a couple of phone calls.  I had no idea this show was even happening until the morning of, when I happened to catch a blurb about it online.  On a whim, I phoned up the Jackson Triggs box office and actually scored a couple of tickets.  With this development, I quickly phoned a couple of local hotels - because who wants to go to an event at a winery and have to drive home? Not I. With some good fortune, I managed to find vacancy at the nearby Charles Inn.  My girlfriend and I enjoyed this quaint little Inn and highly recommend it to anyone visiting the region.

As for the show, it was amazing.  I had no idea what to expect, but I couldn't have asked for anything more.  It was a very casual setting, with all four artists sharing the stage for the entire evening.  They took turns playing songs and helped each other out from time to time - and there was a lot of talent on stage.  Sarah Slean's voice was haunting, Joel Plaskett's confidence and quirky nature was prevalent, Hawksley Workman owned the stage and Steven Page, well, was Steven Page.

The event was hosted by Page, who doubled as an MC and performer.  He was quite verbose and his jokes were hit and miss; his music reminded me of why I don't like the Barenaked Ladies.  That being said, there were a couple of times he broke away from his jumpy guitar riffs and up-tempo strumming patterns that did impress me.

Sarah Slean's voice echoed through the vineyards as she belted out a few of her songs.  A very talented songwriter, her performances were very strong.  In particular, her song "Pilgrim" stood above the rest as she pounded it out on the fake ivory.

Joel Plaskett seemed to have the audience at his mercy. His stage presence was electric as he delivered his acoustic set.  Well, mostly acoustic.  He plugged in his Casio and engaged the crowd in a clever version of "Rewind, Rewind, Rewind".  Other highlights were "Rollin', Rollin', Rollin'" and "Nowhere with You".

Looking dapper in his black suit and Pork Pie hat, Hawksley Workman stole the spotlight.  Every time it was his turn to shine, he took full advantage.  I still have the refrain of "Warhol's portrait of Gretzky: Pretty f*ckin' sexy" engrained in my brain. His voice was bang on, accented by some delicate (and at times crunchy) riffs on his Les Paul.

This was a fantastic night of music in a trendy venue, with some great wine and killer gourmet sausages!

Rating A

CD Review: Joel Plaskett - Three

Good things do come in threes, and I don't even need to think twice (or thrice) about recommending this one.  Three is probably the album I have listed to the most this past year.  The album is extremely well written, produced and performed and there is a little something for everyone on this disc.  It jumps around from folk, to rock, to rockabilly-blues and back to rock again - all with a bit of east coast flavour.  Plaskett's writing style is distinct and he really hits his stride with Three.

My three stars on the album are as follows, but there could easily be twelve stars:
3.     "Beyond, Beyond, Beyond"
2.     "New Scotland Blues" 
1.    "Rollin', Rollin' Rollin'"

You can buy it here:  Amazon

It's Fried, eh?

Google Images uncovered this little diagram for me.  I can't remember what I was actually searching for, but I came across this little gem and had to lift it.  It's probably just my twisted sense, but I found this quite amusing.

Enjoy the weekend!

Concert Review: Tom Petty & The Heartbreakers, Crosby, Stills & Nash - Air Canada Centre - Toronto, ON

Like a fine wine, Tom Petty & The Heartbreakers seem to get better with age.  Last night at the ACC, Mr. Petty and his ensemble brought their Floridian brand of Rock N' Roll north of the border and did not disappoint the sold out crowd on hand.  Opening the show with a blast from the past, "Listen to Her Heart", they quickly set the hook and jumped right back to the 90's with a few timeless classics - not to mention a great rendition of Fleetwood Mac's "Oh Well".  A nice surprise was a trip back 'into the great wide open', in the form of "King's Highway".

The band dedicated a small block of the show to their new album, "Mojo" - notables were the bluesy "Good Enough" and "I Should Have Known It", which (especially live) has a Zeppelin feel to it.  The balance of the show was filled with more Petty classics, highlighted by the always popular "Don't Come Around Here No More".

On a personal note, I have seen Petty eight or nine times over the years, beginning with the Strange Behavior (Full Moon Fever) tour at Kingswood Music Theater in 1989.  I must say that each time I see him; the bar seems to be set higher.  He knows what his fans want and delivers every time, on point. I enjoyed last night's show thoroughly.

Honorable mention goes to Crosby, Stills & Nash who opened up the show.  I was glad I got a chance to see them.  They were very entertaining and Stephen Stills was in fine form on the lead guitar, but there were some off-key harmonies and missed notes when it came to the vocals.  The energy they generated made up for the errors and the crowd was definitely on their side.

Rating A

Tom Petty - Toronto Set List

Listen to Her Heart
You Don't Know How It Feels
I Won't Back Down
Free Fallin'
Oh Well (Fleetwood Mac cover)
Mary Jane's Last Dance
Kings Highway
Breakdown
Jefferson Jericho Blues
Good Enough
Running Man's Bible
I Should Have Known It
Learning to Fly
Don't Come Around Here No More
Refugee
ENCORE:
Runnin' Down a Dream
You Wreck Me

Rant: The BOB sign and why it bothers me

This morning I was driving to work and saw one of those "Baby on Board" signs hanging in a car window.  For whatever reason, this woke up the hamster in my head, the wheel started to spin... and today's rant begins.

I'm really not sure of the purpose of these signs.  Traffic accidents are just that, accidents.  We do not have the ability to pick and choose who we're going to hit or who is going to hit us.  I don't change my driving habits based on the sign hanging in your window, and I'm quite positive that no one else does either.  So why bother?  Is it as simple as someone wanting to broadcast the fact they have procreated? And if so, why?  Good for you, you've replaced yourself on the planet.  Do I care? No.  Does any other stranger on the road?  Doubtful.  So, un-suck your little self important suction cups and please, drive safely.

Photo: The hops, they grow...

My recently planted Centennial Hops are doing well... they have started to ascend!

Food Review: Salpicón Restaurant - Chicago, IL

On a recent trip to Chicago, my girlfriend and I sauntered down to the concierge in search of Mexican food in Chicago.  Without hesitation, and with great excitement, the helpful Four Seasons employee directed us to a little place called Salpicón.

After exploring Navy Pier, we jumped in a cab and headed for dinner.  From beginning to end, this was one of the more memorable meals I have had in a while.  We started off in the bar with top-shelf margaritas and a tuna tartar appetizer... both off the charts!  After being seated, we tried the homemade guacamole - once again, top notch. For dinner we each ordered off the menu, although the specials sounded wonderful.  My GF had the Platos Fuertes (sweet potato crusted halibut with a chipotle cream sauce) and I had the Filete de Res en Salsa de Moritas con Hongos (beef tenderloin in a tomatillo-morita sauce).  Both dishes were to-die-for - a lot of heat, but so much flavour.  Our waiter also set us up with wine pairings for our meals; they were fantastic choices.

We finished up with some sipping tequila (Don Julio 1942), which capped the evening of nicely.  Great food, great atmosphere, great service from a knowledgeable waiter... A+ in my books.  I recommend this restaurant to anyone looking for great Mexican food in Chicago.

Address:
1252 N Wells St
Chicago, IL 60610

It's Fried, eh?

There is a lot going on in this ad...  a goat stealing popcorn, a kid with the supercharged grin, a creepy guy in a suit spying on the all of the 'family fun', the fact "low in tar" is a selling point, or the douchebag in the footer who has that "I smoke, so f*ck you" look about him ... this ad has it all.   Have a good weekend!

Photo: Blue Angels at the Chicago Air Show 2010

The U.S. Navy Blue Angels at the Chicago Air and Water Show - taken August 14, 2010

Concert Review: Aerosmith, Sammy Hagar & The Wabos, August 17, 2010 - Air Canada Centre - Toronto, ON

On Tuesday night, we ventured down to the ACC in Toronto to see some rock-n-roll journeymen in action.  After quaffing a few pints at one of my favorite watering holes (C'est What? On Front St.), we headed off to the show.  Sammy Hagar & The Wabos opening in support of Aerosmith. 

Hagar, now 62 years of age, showed no signs of slowing down when he took the stage to open the show.  He cranked out some of his solo tunes, some Van Halen classics, and even a Montrose medley - all the while indulging in his trademark libations (margaritas) as he commanded the stage.  At one point, he even offered bar service to the front row in the form of tequila shots, administered by his personal on-stage waitresses!

Aerosmith took the stage promptly at 9:06PM and it was certainly an interesting performance.  Half way into the second song, "Love in an Elevator", Steven Tyler appeared to fall off the stage.  I later learned that he was bumped off the stage by guitarist Joe Perry.  After that, the tension seemed to grow between Tyler and Perry.  Despite the setback, the show went on and they certainly rocked the house - but there was definitely an awkward vibe in the air.  Personally, the highlights were "Livin' on the Edge", "Dream On" and the Beatles cover "Come Together".  Overall, this was a very enjoyable night.

Rating: B

It's Fried, eh?

Just in case you were wondering, this diagram explains that there is a right way to wash a child, and a wrong way to wash a child.  Apparently hosing an infant off  like it's a dog is "BAD". 

Hey, Wha Happened?

Mmmmm... more putrid food from the 70's.  Are these Crab Nibbles or Crab Nipples?  Either way, keep them the hell off of my plate.

It's Fried, eh?

Is it just me or does this Cling Wrap ad look like the early stages of a homicide in progress?

A Poetic Moment with Tony Joe White

Down in Louisiana
Where the alligators grow so mean
Lived a girl that I swear to the world
Made the alligators look tame

Polk salad Annie
'Gators got your granny
Everybody said it was a shame
For the mama was working on the chain-gang
What a mean, vicious woman

Everyday before suppertime
She'd go down by the truck patch
And pick her a mess of Polk salad
And carry it home in a tote sack

Polk salad Annie
'Gators got you granny
Everybody said it was a shame
'Cause the mama was working on the chain-gang
Whoo, how wretched, dispiteful, straight-razor totin' woman,
Lord have mercy.

Sock a little Polk salad to him
Yeah, you know what, yeah, yeah

-- This song was called "Polk Salad Annie" and was pretty popular in the late 60's/early 70's... Elvis even covered it!  Out of context, the lyrics are delightfully insane... to find out what the hell Tony Joe was talking about, check out the Wiki page http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Poke_Salad_Annie

Beer Review: Highlander 'learn life taste freedom' Pale Ale (South River, Ontario)

I was at the LCBO near our cottage last weekend and came across this beer.  Like I always do when I see a new micro, I bought it - and I must say I am glad I did.  This pale ale is very smooth with a rich malty flavour and enough hops to balance things out nicely.  It's colour is a deep copper/amber and it's carbonation is low.  I would certainly buy it again!  For the record, it is brewed by the Highlander Brewing Co. based out of South River, Ontario.

Rating: B

It's Fried, eh?

I love the internet... it took me exactly eight seconds to find something this twisted.  Have a good weekend!

Movie Review: Grown Ups

 We checked out 'Grown Ups' last night at the theatre and I was quite skeptical, especially after the last couple of Sandler movies... Click and the Zohan were pretty painful in my mind's eye.  Quite surprisingly, this movie is actually really funny.  It goes back to the days of classic Sandler (including the Steve Buscemi cameo), back to the days of Billy Madison, Happy Gilmore and Big Daddy.  The movie also has a great cast (littered with SNL alumni) who strongly contribute to making this movie work.  They even dug up David Spade!

The storyline is relatively predictable and at times altogether missing, but there is enough comedy in there to carry it through.  I am hoping that Sandler continues in this gear as his movies were really starting to grate on me... 'Punch Drunk Love' has to be in my top ten worst movies ever.  Stop that.  Bad Adam.

Rating: B

YGTBFKM: The KFC Double Down

Do you ever wonder why the North American population has a growing obesity problem?  Look no further than exhibit A: The KFC Double Down Sandwich.  I'm not just picking on KFC (as there are plenty of other culprits), but this example radiates my point.  This fast food atrocity has bacon and cheese wedged in between two pieces of fried "chicken" and clocks in at a whopping 540 calories.  For the record, it also has 32 grams of fat and 1380 milligrams of salt.  I wouldn't eat this thing with Hitler's mouth... I'd like to live past 40, thanks.

Movie Review: Hot Tub Time Machine

Here is the gist... Mr. 80's himself, John Cusack tries to recapture his youthful, 'Better Off Dead' persona in this little thing they aptly named 'Hot Tub time Machine'.  This title does not leave much to the imagination - it's about a bunch of friends who get shipped back to the 80's when their hot tub becomes a time machine after someone spills an energy drink on the controls.  I would love to see the Mythbusters tackle that one!

I am not going to lambaste this movie because it is what it is.  There are a couple of chuckles, but I did not find myself laughing aloud.  There is plenty of vulgarity and awkward humour, but as you might imagine the story line is a little thin. I didn't hate this movie (now there's a glowing recommendation), so if you're in the mood for a mindless comedy, or have an uncontrollable urge to see some leg warmers and headbands - have at it!

Rating C

Hey, Wha Happened?

I can't believe this vehicle didn't take off!  It's sleek, stylish, Oscar The Grouch green, and nothing short of a death trap.  At least the family will not fly through the windshield... as long as Dad remembers to fold it down.

Rant: The Self-Important Motorist and Their Correlation to the Traffic Jam

In my estimation, it is only a small number drivers who cause traffic jams.  We have all seen them, and probably cursed them.  It is the discourteous, self-absorbed drivers who race up the right lane to merge at the lanes-end that slows everyone else down.  You know the ones, they usually have a coffee or cell phone in their hand; and because their schedule is more important than ours... we wait. Can I get a collective "Fuck You"?  I have cast many a scowl and the odd hand gesture to these drivers in my day - I mean, you wouldn't do this at the bank or grocery store, would you?  Now, when people dawn the armour that is vehicle - things change!  Everyone grows testicles and bad manners prevail.

Now in fairness, it is not always the fault of the right racer.  Often times, there is no room to merge prior to the lane ending; that is because every driver in the left lanes plays the 'let's see how close to the bumper I can get' game.  Relax, people.  Chill out, have some dip.  I know Oprah is on, but that is why they invented the PVR.  If everyone added a little respect, courtesy and spacing to their driving routine, it would make it some much more tolerable for the masses.

Photo: The Corn Coon

I took this photo in the summer of 2008... when was the last time you saw a raccoon eating corn right off of the cob?

Playlist Recipes - Annoying Songs to Play Loud and Piss Off Your Neighbours

Trashmen - Surfin' Bird
Bobby McFerrin - Drive My Car
Aqua - Barbie Girl
Pearl Jam - Bugs
MC Hammer - Pray
Captain & Tennile - Muskrat Love
The Fat Boys - Wipe Out
Cheech Marin - Red Blue and Yellow Too
Run DMC - Ghostbusters
Digital Underground - Same Song
Kinky Friedman - Homo Erectus
Dee Lite - What Is Love?
Pat Boone - Crazy Train
Celine Dion & Anastacia - You Shook Me All Night Long
Gheorghe Zamfir (master of the pan flute!!!)- Don't Cry For Me Argentina
Bruce Willis - Under The Boardwalk
David Hasselhoff - Du
Slim Whitman - Indian Love Call
Starland Vocal Band - Afternoon Delight
Les Baxter - Moon Moods
Guns & Roses - Right Nextdoor To Hell

It's Fried, eh?

I love cookbooks from the 70's, food was so much more interesting.  Take for example, this culinary train wreck... nothing says seafood like yellow and green - and of course, when I think salmon, I think brussel sprouts.  It looks more like a Dali painting than Stuffed Salmon, but that's what you get when you mix recreational drugs and cooking.

A Poetic Moment with Biz Markie

So I took blah-blah's word for it at this time
I thought just havin' a friend couldn't be no crime
'Cause I have friends and that's a fact
Like Agnes, Agatha, Germaine, and Jacq
Forget about that, let's go into the story
About a girl named blah-blah-blah that adored me
So we started talkin', getttin' familiar
Spendin' a lot of time so we can build a
A relationship or some understanding
How it's gonna be in the future we was plannin'
Everything sounded so dandy and sweet
I had no idea I was in for a treat
After this was established, everything was cool
The tour was over and she went back to school
I called every day to see how she was doin'
Everytime that I called her it seemed somethin' was brewin'
I called her room, a guy picked up, and then I called again
I said, "Yo, who was that?" "Oh, he's just a friend"
Don't gimme that, don't even gimme that
Jus' bust this
You, you got what I need but you say he's just a friend
And you say he's just a friend, oh baby

Playlist Recipes: Driving Tunes, Volume I

Tom Petty - Saving Grace
Matt Mays El Torpedo - Travelin'
Bare Jr. - Nothing Better To Do
Golden Earring - Twilight Zone
Queen - Fat Bottomed Girls
Mike Ness - The Devil In Miss Jones
Black Crowes w/ Jimmy Page - Hey, Hey What Can I Do
Greenday - Holiday
Kathleen Edwards - Back To Me
Bob Dylan - Lonesome Day Blues
Creedence Clearwater Revival - Fortunate Son
Kenny Wayne Sheppard - Aberdeen
Weezer - My Name Is Jonas
Tragically Hip - Three Pistols
Ryan Adams - Let It Ride
Phish - Chalkdust Torture
Johnny Cash - Cocaine Blues
Joel Plaskett - Rollin' Rollin', Rollin'

Feel free to reply with your recipe for a Driving Tune Mix CD.

It's Fried, eh?

What's wrong with this picture?

There is no right or wrong answer to this question, but there's a lot going on here.  I'm not sure why the whale is crushing some sort of leprechaun or what's going on with the rhino with the flower in the background... I'm open to your interpretations...

Review: Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers - Mojo

After a several year hiatus from recording with the complete Heartbreakers ensemble, Mojo breaks some new ground for TP+HB.  The album is quite eclectic with strong blues roots, a reggae tune and a couple of rock ballads. This album was also done on-the-fly, completely raw with no overdubs - a refreshing change in the world of music today.

I have been a huge Petty fan for as long as I can remember, and the first Mojo listen-through didn't really catch me, but it is proving to be infectious.  The second time though some of the tunes really started to grab my ear.  I don't think it will be my favorite TP+HB album, but it is certainly worth the buy - especially if you are a fan.

My three stars on the album are:
3.     "Running Man's Bible"
2.     "Something Good Coming" 
1.    "I Should Have Known It" 

Rating: B+

Rant: The Side and Effect

Okay, let's see now?  This is not a joke. These are the actual potential side effects of a drug manufactured to cure depression - and in fairness, I will not name the drug (although I'm sure you could figure it out if you really wanted to). I found myself watching the commercial for this drug, and after they listed the ninth or tenth side effect, I was actually laughing aloud.  Now, depression is no laughing matter, however I think I would rather be depressed instead of opening myself up to even two items on this list.  I can see it now... "I'm not depressed, but this hot dog tastes like grapes, I'm cold, my stomach hurts and I'm going to f***ing kill you... now let's go play in that fountain"...

Without further adieu, here is the list...

Nausea; Drowsiness; Headaches; Dry mouth; Dizziness; Insomnia; Constipation; Fatigue; Diarrhea; Loss of appetite; Sore throat or runny nose; Weakness; Sweating; Vomiting; A decreased sex drive (libido); Upper respiratory tract infection; Coughing; Shakiness (tremors); Frequent urination; Muscle pain; Sexual side effects, including ejaculation problems, a decreased sex drive (libido), erectile dysfunction, and orgasm problems; Blurred vision; Anxiety or agitation; Weight loss; Hot flashes; Yawning; Abdominal pain (or stomach pain); Vertigo (a spinning sensation); Gas; Chills; Indigestion or heartburn; Seasonal allergies; Muscle spasms; Taste changes; Abnormal dreams; Cough; Suicidal thoughts or behavior; Hostility or aggressiveness; Engaging in unusual or dangerous activities; Restlessness or inability to sit still; Extreme elation or feelings of happiness that may switch back and forth with a depressed or sad mood; Other unusual changes in behavior; Low blood sugar (hypoglycemia); Chest palpitations; Difficulty passing urine; Signs of an allergic reaction, including an unexplained rash, hives, itching, unexplained swelling, wheezing, or difficulty breathing or swallowing; Atrial fibrillation; Congestive heart failure; Canker sores; Ear pain; Acne; Irritable bowel syndrome (IBS); High cholesterol or high triglycerides; High blood pressure (hypertension); Sensitivity to the sun.

Photo: The Deadpan Cat

This is Furley, doing his best Charles Grodin impression...

Review: Lake of Bays Pale Ale (Baysville, Ontario)

Lake of Bays Brewing Company, a relatively new face in the Ontario beer market has come up with a pretty decent Pale Ale. It certainly not the best beer I have ever tried, but it represents itself nicely.  Light amber in colour, it has a smooth taste with strong notes of malt and hops.  The carbonation is not heavy, which adds to its smoothness - overall a very enjoyable beer.

Rating: B

Review : NOFX - Never Trust A Hippy

This mini-release was a prelude to their 2006 release "Wolves in Wolves Clothing". The disc is concise; however, it is laden with raw, catchy and at times risky punk songs. If you are easily offended, please beware that the lyrics take numerous cynical shots at the flaws in politics and religion. Any NOFX fan will not be disappointed.

Rating: B

Review: Hoptical Illusion Almost Pale Ale (Barrie, Ontario)

Although this beer company is taking its cues from a couple of renowned U.S. craft brewers, 'Hoptical Illusion' is a breath of fresh air in the growing craft beer market in Ontario.  This 'Almost Pale Ale' is crisp and hoppy, but well enough balanced so the hops do not over-power the beer (not that I mind when they do).  For those who care, it clocks in at about 5%, so it's not going to kick your ass.

Formerly the Robert Simpson Brewing Company, the re-branded Flying Monkeys are in a good market position to do some local damage.  I know my local LCBO has a good turnover rate of HI, so they are definitely gaining steam. 
Jrazy strongly recommends this beer!

Rating: B+ 

Question: If monkeys are potatoes, are carrots squirrels?

Does anyone know the answer to this age-old question?  Discuss.

Review: MATT MAYS - WHEN THE ANGELS MAKE CONTACT

A departure from Mays’ previous works, “When the Angels Make Contact…” is a brilliant masterpiece.  The album is quite eclectic and ranges from acoustic ballads (Morning Sun), to solid rock tracks (850 Commando) and even morphs into electronica (Midnight is the Time) – vaguely reminding me of Neil Young’s ‘Transformer Man’ experiments.  This album works.  Lyrically, its strength comes from its simplicity.All in all, a no bullshit, (almost) cover to cover gem.

Side-note: I had the good fortune to see this album performed live, and in my opinion, it will only be a matter of time before he hits the serious mainstream.  A gifted songwriter with a compelling voice who translates his energy to the stage with conviction. Buy WHEN THE ANGELS MAKE CONTACT on Amazon.ca

Jrazy Rating: A